WARP EIGHT IN THE SLOW LANE *** INTRODUCTION ***
While browsing through WITSIG early one morning, it struck me that I may have something to contribute. Naturally, that worried me. After further consideration, worry became paranoia. What would people think? How would people react? How big is Lithuania? Whatever happened to Gavrillio Prinzip? Who cares?
Knowing that the answers to these and other questions may be important to others, I was inspired. In an effort to make a good first impression, I will answer the first questions first:
1. Whatever they wanted to, or were told they wanted to, depending on the person and the question.
2. Usually hardly at all, because all too many of them are numb in major areas of their skulls.
3. 25, 175 square miles.
4. He died. (Surprise!)
5. How the hell do I know? Just because you’re not paranoid doesn’t mean everybody isn’t out to get you.
You may ask (or you may not), what this could possibly have to do with you. All of these questions and answers relate to you in some way, except possibly number three. Or maybe only number three. Furthermore, life is like that.
In weeks to come, we will explore items of interest to frogs, agricultural pilots, video-tape machines, life-patterning acids and others of you who choose to send your electronic selves this way. The subject will be life in general, and how that relates to each of us, if at all. Specifically, it will concern life from my viewpoint, which is way off in the corner of a spherical room (yes, it’s topologically possible) where I can see all the action and not have anybody sneak up behind me. On a somewhat regular basis, I charge into the middle of life, with varying results.
If you watch long enough, and charge in often enough, you will surprise a few folks, not the least of whom is yourself. You are also likely to learn a lot and form some opinions. If you didn’t, the bruises and scars would hardly be worthwhile, and you would become a good little soldier on the sidelines (see answers one and two above). I refuse to treat life as a spectator sport.
So stick with Kermit. Feel free to charge in with me. Feel free to throw harpoons at me. Most of all, feel free to throw ideas at me. If you promise to chew up and consider mine, I’ll do the same with yours. Depending on the ideas and the slots we try to put them into, we’ll all wind up with better heads or very bad ulcers. Either way, we won’t be just watching.